In our daily practice we often accept events without really thinking about it. For example, the queue at the cash register, or a traffic jam, or a delay in the public transport.
It also happens that we accept under certain conditions. You’ve put your heart into the making of a meal for a special occasion. When buying the necessary ingredients, you may find these not good enough or maybe even too expensive. At that (same) moment you may consider how to prepare that meal in a different way.
We also say that we accept a situation, but in reality we don’t. How often does one hear at funerals people saying to the widow(er) that they will come and see him or her, or that he or she must join them for dinner. The thing is, it hardly happens. In comparison the phrase “a ceiling made from glass” which is in use in companies, I use the phrase “a door made from glass” for people who lost a dear one. People accept that the relation between you and your partner doesn’t exist anymore, and yet… they avoid you.
Unconditional means without conditions or without making demands. Unconditional also means without limitation, or without consideration, or without hesitation. Sometimes it also means blindly, or absolute, or pure.
Acceptance is not simple in itself, but when it is unconditional it becomes very difficult. What about for example “I accept you unconditional!” In other words, “I accept you without hesitation and consideration who you are, what you are, and what you have done and do. It doesn’t matter, I accept you blindly without any limitation… always!”
You might say “Yes, but, experience or history taught…” When you say words like these then at that same moment you don’t accept unconditional.
Maybe you can define unconditional acceptance also as pure love. A form of love that is attributed to the very Highest in believe systems. That doesn’t mean that unconditional acceptance is impossible for us humans… on the contrary. It may not be pure, but some of us come very close. Think for instance at the love of a mother for her child. Or think of the unconditional acceptance of two lovers; lovers who trust each other blindly.
At first unconditional acceptance is not directed to the other, but to yourself. When you fully trust yourself and accept completely who you are including all your limitations, only then you are able to accept another unconditionally. That is quite a bit!
Two lovers who trust each other blindly come, in my opinion, regarding unconditional acceptance a long way. And the deeper their relation becomes the closer those people come to the real meaning of unconditional acceptance of each other. Isn’t that awesome!
However, how awesome this is for these two people, when such a relation is broken for whatever reason, the grief of such a loss is immeasurable. The processing of that grief will take “a while.” It may be even the case that at some point in time others are beginning to wander why the grief has not been processed. But on the other hand those others should also be able to accept that (unconditional).