(130) It’s different now

It’s different now and the journey wasn’t easy. Now I take all te time I need. It feels serene like floating as a leaf on water.

Estimated reading time: 2 minutes

It’s different now after learning to cope with the loss of my daughter Anne Birgit and my partner Mary-Anne. It’s not that the loss, pain, and sorrow are gone. I can now deal with it, deep in my heart and that connection from heart to heart will always be there. Now on untrodden paths and amazingly, it feels like it should have been this way all the time.

It’s different now

I’m a completely different person than I used to be,
don’t do the things anymore I used to do!

I used to be materially oriented
everything needed to go fast, faster, fastest.
Then it became immaterial
and I started to slow down.

Now it is emotionally based
and I go at a snail’s pace.
I now counsel people
with their loss and grief.

In hindsight …
I would have wanted to do this sooner!
Did my muses have to die,
to make this clear?
Perhaps that was the plan all along
and embrace me
with the love
that was missing in my youth.

And now … now it feels …
no, now its Knowing …
deep inside my heart …
that I’m going in the right direction,
that everything was meant to be.

Hans Fransen, 2021

It’s different now and the journey wasn’t easy. Now I take all te time I need. It feels serene like floating as a leaf on water.

It’s different now. The journey wasn’t easy. There were times I almost gave up and yet, somehow, I was able to push through.! It took a lot of energy and perseverance. And yet, in hindsight, it was well worth it!
In retrospect, yes, that it is.

I wish you to have a fine day.

(109) A Happy Feeling

Let the moments of sadness, of fear, of pain, of disappointment fly away like the Butterfly and let the joyful feeling, the sense of oneness, sense of belonging that you may give yourself, share in these seconds of being whole fulfil you.

Dear Soul, do you want to write for me?

In an unexpected moment of one second, when entering a hallway, I was surprised by a beautiful appearance that flew in my direction. In this one second, I pondered to catch it and to set it free from this Hall, because it should fly in nature. Everything during this one second made me catch this beautiful Butterfly and search for a window.

While searching I could not find a window, then went up towards to the terrace where I could let this beautiful appearance rest.

On the way to the terrace, my sister came upstairs and, in my enthusiasm wanted to share this feeling … by carefully opening my hand I showed the beautiful Butterfly to my sister, she was just as surprised by this wonderful spectacle what was given to us this morning.

While talking and searching for an attempt to give the Butterfly her freedom, my sister tried to grab her phone to capture her.

While filming the Butterfly stayed quietly on my hand, showing itself in her most beautiful outfit, a colour splendour that made us happy, that happy inner feeling you can’t explain had passed by a couple of times in a few seconds, in a deep respect, a deep appreciation, a deep togetherness, feeling a deep unity with this beauty from nature. She had closed her wings and, walking to the terrace, she opened it, this colour splendour warmed us up inside and amazed us in a way that was very special.

The beautiful butterfly sitting on my hand

Walking to the hydrangea to let her rest on the leaves and then to meet freedom, she sat very quietly and occasionally let her wings close and open. During this short period of connection with three creatures of nature we felt that this, this connectedness was necessary to make us realize that nature has so much to offer and that nature in ourselves needs so little to create this happy feeling for what it is.

At some point while talking to her she showed her wings spread on my hand where I said: “Go … go enjoy flying into nature … be yourself.”

The beauty she radiated during these few seconds made us marvel this moment for the rest of the day.

A moment of awareness with this beautiful Butterfly reminded us that every second of the day you can enjoy yourself, be yourself and because of all kinds of circumstances you can sometimes no longer see the beauty of this Butterfly, can feel it, can share it in the way that Nature you offer … for free and for naught.

This Butterfly stands for that bit of enjoyment, rejoicing yourself by looking through the eyes of this beauty that makes you surprise, rejoice and warm.

Think like the Butterfly, spread your wings, show off your colour splendour, and sometimes take a break to relax so that you can fly out the way you want and can fly out to a new place, a new feeling, a new encounter, a new experience! Embark on a voyage of discovery within yourself as the Butterfly did in this hall, and watch what you can see, be able to experience in a matter of seconds, which will make you stop for a moment in wonder, the admiration of nature around you, on Mother Earth, in nature and within yourself.

Let the moments of sadness, of fear, of pain, of disappointment fly away like the Butterfly and let the joyful feeling, the sense of oneness, sense of belonging that you may give yourself, share in these seconds of being whole fulfil you.

A happy feeling is that feeling where you press that Heart & Soul button to let the Light shine in a dark room. Be this button yourself, because anything is possible! A few seconds to rejoice your heart, rejoice your soul, and above all rejoicing your life, making other energies realize that we are all just seconds on Mother Earth to make this wonder, admiration, to be allowed to share as the butterfly did with me and my sister.

That’s where I’m this beauty grateful for.

(54) Christmas 2014 & New Year 2015

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It’s the period of Christmas and New Year again.

It’s time to rethink what happened to us this year. We should make sure that we need to learn from the errors we made and we also should remember the good things that happened to us.

I wish you all a Merry Christmas and a Prosperous 2015,

Hans Fransen

(53) News and… Schoolchildren in Africa

During the period following my blog of 23 October 2014 I have received much support. I would like to thank everyone who phoned or emailed me from the depth of my heart.

In 2015 I will continue with posting my blogs and the activities of the Mourn & Grief Foundation. This time not every week, but every 15th of the month at 19:00 hours CET.

 

I would like to draw your attention to the following initiative:

Please, help my son Mervyn Fransen and the AfrikaPAK’t Foundation for supporting local school on their route through Africa!

For more information see: Giving Schoolchildren Means To Go Forward.

 

I do hope to see you in the near future.

Yours sincerely,
Hans

(52) Dear Readers,

A few things have happened lately in my private life that have a major impact. The impacts of these are such that I don’t have the energy nor the will to maintain this site for a while.

Hope to meet you again sometime in the future. Until then, your emails will always be answered.

Best regards,

Hans